You guys, Taylor Hanson read my blog.
Maybe to you that sounds like, “OMG, Dustin Diamond read my blog!” or “Ahh, Tanya Harding read my blog!” But no… you guys, TAYLOR HANSON read my blog! If this were 1997, I might have died with the news.
A lot of you keep asking me if I’ve heard anything from Hanson after professing my undying love and making public my Make-A-Wish plea to them. The answer was no until a couple of weeks ago. Now, the answer is kind of.
At my “I Beat Cancer” party, my friend, Jeff, pulled me aside to tell me that there had been word from THan. (When you’ve been “friends” as long as we have, you can use cute little nicknames like that. I like to imagine that he refers to me as “HLags” or “The real love of my life” or “Crazy Stalker Fan.”) Jeff has been a solid bystander in this whole Hanson/Heather love affair, knows it’s actually serious business, and made this happen for me.
The short story is that Jeff happened to see a picture of his cousin and Taylor Hanson just hanging out and immediately went to work for me. His cousin forwarded my blog post to the man himself, and HE ACTUALLY READ IT.
The first time I heard this news was at my party so I was super impressionable and emotional. Jeff showed me a text from Taylor Hanson to his cousin ABOUT ME, and maybe I was a little cartoonish — jaw on the floor, hand on the heart –and maybe I said “Oh, my God!” roughly seventeen times.
The next day, I couldn’t remember anything about the exchange except for my own reaction and that Taylor Hanson had read my words. So I saw Jeff again, who re-debriefed me, and I got mad. Like, super mad. Let me first show you the text from Taylor. (I hope you don’t mind THan.)
“Ok. That’s a really big deal. She seems really sweet and that kind of relationship with fans is what’s made it possible for us to be here. I wish I could grant that wish. Let me think on it though. Thanks for sharing.”
The text was from weeks earlier, and I suddenly felt like I had been stood up. I spent a lot of time getting ready for this date — like seventeen years — and you pull a no-call, no-show. I was pissed. Now, I FULLY realize that Hanson owes me nothing, but at the time, I didn’t feel that way. I felt like my friends weren’t really my friends, after all.
Oh, I was a little bit livid…and a lottabit dramatic. I was mad at them in the special way you reserve for family and very close friends. A special cocktail of love and anger. (It’s been a hard year, yo.) If anyone else tried to take a jab, umm, no. It’s a fury that you know will dissipate back into nothing but love in a couple of days. And it did.
I am currently cool with it. I mean, I wish that THan could have granted that wish too (and, yes, I am super sweet, thankyouverymuch), but I get it. You can’t just go throwing free all-inclusive island trips at everyone who asks, but it did get me wondering, especially in my case, why not.
Top 10 Reasons Why THan Can’t Grant My Wish
10. Because it’s not 1997 anymore.
9. He thinks cancer is contagious.
8. There’s a hair length requirement to attend Hanson shows and mine just isn’t long enough right now.
7. He’s afraid he’ll fall in love with me. Duh.
6. He was home schooled so he obviously can’t read.
5. He’s busy washing his hair.
4. He’s not sure where I fall on the well-adjusted female/serial killer scale.
3. Isaac and Zac (the other two-thirds of Hanson) vetoed it. They are so sick of always being overshadowed by Taylor and his fans!
2. Even Taylor thought I was joking. “She has cancer. Wouldn’t she rather go to Disneyland?”
1. He’s a boob man.
Also, if you have any ideas of why Hanson hasn’t granted my wish (I mean, we still have time.), feel free to add them to the list. Smiling is my favorite.